Thanks.
Let me just say that I can take a little snark. I can dish it out too. But this is not the first person who's said something along the lines of "Hey welcome to the married club. Your life is going to go to shit in 3...2....1.."
What's up with that? And let me reiterate, this has been 100% from married people. Not divorcees, not single people -- other marrieds.
Now, I'm not totally naive. I know marriages are hard work, I know committing to a lifetime with ONE person is an immense promise that brings with it all kinds of heartache and challenges. What gets me though, is seeing someone take that leap, aspiring to greatness with another person, your response is snark? "Good luck" with a saucy eye-roll? Isn't it enough to know that there are challenges ahead for a person without laying out the pitfalls one by one?
To be fair, I've been super lucky to have friends, family and co-workers who have had a lot of really inspirational and positive stories about marriage. I know they support my marriage and would do anything to help Matt and me out. The people I'm talking about are, strangely, mostly acquaintances. People who I might discuss the status of the weather with find that disparaging remarks on the future of my marriage are appropriate inter-hallway comments. I find that really strange from a culture that often promotes a wedding as the only acceptable "happy ending" to a tale.
I can't help but wonder how this phenomenon of public marriage bashing got started. Sure, almost 50% of marriages end in divorce and plenty of other go through rough times. But to me that suggests that we should encourage married people - not bash them. Whatever the anthropological reasons, I'm going to find a way to move past it and to project love and happiness because I do believe in marriage - especially mine.
